My husband claimed he would “support” me in whatever I chose to do. ?

By | November 27, 2015

I was blessed to stay at home from April to October. I had my son in July.
We managed very well on hubby income, and I was receiving unemployment,etc. HE initially wanted me to stay at home w/our son, but I told him in April that money was going to decrease over time, and I’d have to go back to work eventually.

Well of course money started to decrease, and I told hubby I was going to look for a job. I acquired a temporary P/T job in October, and its slated to end this week.

Well hubby has been increasingly making unnecessary remarks about me working P/T, and us being “broke”… etc. I have jobs lined up for temp jobs and he even makes comments about those… ” It isn’t permanent?”.. Instead of him thanking me for doing all I can to keep income flowing, he belittles me, like I’m not doing anything.

I manage all the money, and even though I’m working P/T, the bills are still getting paid.. ON TIME…we still have food to eat, gas in both cars, car pymt is being paid ON TIME we aren’t behind in anything except medical bills, but they can wait for now.

I’m online looking for jobs everyday, networking,etc. He knows this. Its just frustrating. Its not enough that I take care of our son most of the time (hubby works 11-8). I’m the one making sure the house is clean, food is cooked, clothes are washed, bills are paid, babies needs are taken care of.

I obtained a MBA degree March 2007, well even though I have the degree, I don’t exactly have any relative experience. All I have is Customer Service/Collections experience. I have applied everywhere.. you name it! Then I think some people “assume” that since I have a Masters, I won’t take a low paying job.

Its hard out there, and hubby is not making it any easier.
Any suggestions?
Well I meant to say, that I think that most companies think I’m “overqualified” because I have a Masters, even though my experience says underqualified.
My resume has been tweaked and tweaked. I’m having a career counselor look @ my resume again today. I’ve even been applying for jobs at Walmart,etc.
I’m upset because he said he would support me, but yet hes giving me all these unnecessary remarks about me working P/T, etc.

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12 thoughts on “My husband claimed he would “support” me in whatever I chose to do. ?

  1. dwaynedunaway

    stop doing all the extra things and once you do, he will appreciate what he is missing.

  2. justbecause

    he knows he’s pushing your buttons. Don’t acknowledge his remarks with defensiveness. Instead, say calmly, no it’s not permanent yet, but I’m optimistic. Or something to that effect. Once he realizes he can’t push your buttons, he will stop.

    Then when you do get that permanent job, make a list of things he will now have to take on. Such as Monday’s and Wednesday’s he does the laundry. Tuesday and Thursday’s he cooks.

  3. just say it

    Doesn’t matter what your degree is – you have to pay dues like everyone else. Start at the bottom and work your way up – some skills can’t be learned in a classroom. Welcome to what they don’t tell you in college…

    As for your husband – he’s looking for stability – income he can count on. It’s not a reflection of you trying or not trying – it’s him trying to keep the budget and monies in order – even if it’s just mentally. I can’t believe that nobody will hire you – sounds like something is off there. I would highly recommend you see a career coach – get your resume done by a professional, get help practicing interviews…whatever it takes. Sometimes it takes some outside guidance to fine tune your job search/interviewing skills.

  4. fainstl

    The way the job market is, you’re lucky to have a part time job.

    Why not contact your unemployment office and find out what you can do to become certified to have a home based child care facility in your home?
    That way, you could stay at home with your child, while making a decent income watching 3 or 4 other little kids.
    Granted, by the end of the day you’ll feel like you need a massage and a stiff drink, but it is a source of income until the economy improves.

  5. bronzebabekentucky

    you need to ask him exactly what he expected you to do… you need to open the lines of communication

  6. Bird

    Yup. Tell him that you already have a full time cleaning up after his sloppy ass and his kid. He should be thankful you’re working another part time job on top of that.

    If he thinks what you do is so insignificant, tell him to try to do it all for the next few days and prove how easy it is to do.

    It doesn’t sound like this one is going to get talked out. You’ll have to stand your ground and demand respect.

  7. Lisa Marie

    You can send a thank you letter to the bra burners for convincing men that women can work, raise children and run a household with no help.

  8. texan_reformed

    I’m not sure what you’re upset about: Is it the job situation or your hubby’s attitude? I think you may be hurting due to the job situation and taking it out on your hubby, which is quite normal.
    Sounds like you’d rather stay home with your baby, which is the most noble of all work you could possibly do. If that’s the case, then perhaps you can work with hubby to figure out how to make it on less income and (more importantly) come to terms yourself regarding your advanced degree and staying at home with your precious baby. You are blessed with options and smarts, so you can make it happen! Good luck!

  9. amcs

    Remind him that you gave birth to your son, and therefore that’s why you are off work, and that you are doing the best that you possibly can, and would appreciate his support.

  10. pastorwilliambarhorst

    Hi, Your husband should know the world, not only this country is in a global recession, jobs are not only scarce, but the unemployment rate is going through the roof. He should be thankful you are not one of the thousands in foreclosure. I pray that you land a jo so good that your income surpasses his! I ask this In Jesus name, Amen, Jesus said ask in his name and yee shall receive. I pray the Lord intercedes to show him that he is wrong. I would just continue to do as you are doing and pray. I help families in need as the Lord directs me and there are many families that have become homeless because of the job market, the crash in the stock market, and fire victims, and all the others that have fallen victim to the weather in the gulf coast. He should thank God above for his blessings. I for one was in a life threatening car accident back in 1981, which caused me to lose all I had, was left paralyzed from neck down, had total amnesia for 18 months, almost bled to death from all the internal bleeding, and during my hospitalization, my wife died of cancer and diabetes, which I did not learn until over two and a half years later, because doctors told my family not to tell me because of the head trauma I had because the roof of my car was embedded in my skull and went into my brain, and our children had to move from NJ to Virgina to stay with their mothers relatives, which are now both married and have their own children still in Virginia. My son caught his wife cheating on him with her boss and are going through divorce, and while all that was going on the mortgage was unpaid for 4 months so far and he just found out because he got foreclosure notices. Because I had to fight for social security disability for 15 years I in the mean time ended up homeless for 10 years. I finally won my social security benefits and I can walk, with pain still, but still can not work at my profession as a chef or formal waiter. I fed many of the rich and famous, Frankie Valli, Morgan Fairchild, Buddy Hackett just to mention a few. But I strive foreword and graduated courses in real estate to prevent foreclosures for people and learned how to flip properties and I just registered my business this past Friday. I took the courses so I can hire people to do the rehabbing, and flip the homes, so I can make money to do more continually, and then keep a few homes enabling me to help fire victims, the homeless, abused women and children, the disabled, elderly and veterans. Your husband needs an education on life’s plagues, to show him his life can change in a micro second like it did to me and so many others across this country. Maybe then he will wake up and appreciate you. God Bless you and your family and know you all will be in my prayers. [email protected] http://www.bofmissions.org & http://www.myspace.com/pastorwilliambarhorst and I also have a facebook page and a msn page. My Facebook Page:
    http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?v=feed&id=732715080

    My msn page:
    http://cid-07e440974c18a7c9.profile.live.com/details/?lc=1033
    http://cid-07e440974c18a7c9.spaces.live.com/

  11. milk making mama #2 due Aug 12th

    Does he do half of the house work and half of the baby care? If he does he MIGHT have a small reason to whine a bit, but if you are doing ALL of it then you have a full time job taking care of baby and house AND you are working a PT job? I would tell HIM to get a PT job so he can see how much you are doing!! My hubby works 14 hours a day 6 1/2 days a week so that I can stay home with our kids and NEVER complains. THAT is a real man!! Tell your man to take his balls out of your purse and grow up!

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