How should I go about convincing my boyfriend to start TTC?

By | October 7, 2015

I’m 17 years old. I’ll be 18 in August. I’m out of high school as of June 2009. I’m now in college, doing online courses. My boyfriend, whom I’ve been with for 10 months now, is 19. He’s also out of school and works full time on his family’s farm. We’ve been living together for about 3 months now. He says he plans to marry me and doesn’t ever want to be with someone else. When we first met, we talked about having kids.. like if we ever wanted them and what not. Then a couple months ago, we talked about it again this time with more detail. He makes a decent amount of money, we’re young but we’re stable. He says he wants a baby eventually, but I’m starting to think I’d like to start TTC now, I hear it can take up to 6 – 12 months to conceive naturally. Should I bring it up to him again or just wait for him to bring it up to ask about the TTC?
I’m not in a pact and I’m not tricking him :/ We’re both serious about our relationship and we’re both serious about having kids, I just don’t want to seem pushy is all.

Download PDF

9 thoughts on “How should I go about convincing my boyfriend to start TTC?

  1. Teeny Beeny

    There’s really no need to even discuss it with him. Just start poking holes in the condoms or not taking your pills. Better yet, why not ask the other participants in your “pact” of they managed to trick a teenage boy into conceiving a child. They’ll likely have some great advice for you.

  2. Timid Women Rarely Make History

    Wait. Wait. Wait. I cannot stress than enough. You are very young. You have some time. Don’t rush into parenthood. It is a full time job. Believe me. It changes every aspect of your life.

  3. Dallas is pregnant w/ # 3!

    Don’t pressure him. You are both so young. Why do you want to be a parent at this age? I was 16, and I never was a normal teenager, and I’m still not a normal 23 year old. I grew up so fast, and now have to wait for my children to grow up before living out “these years” of my life.

    If you want to be a good mother, and of course you do, then wait. Get married first – because babies thrive in marriages (and how fun is it to pick out a dress?).

    Let yourselves grow up before trying to grow a child.

  4. Noah's Mommy is expecting #2

    You don’t convince your partner to TTC. It is something BOTH parties should be ready for.

    You are young so you still have tons of time to think about and discuss this. For now just enjoy your boyfriend. You’ve only been together for 10 months. That’s really not a long a time at all. Get to know each other more before you bring another person into the mix. My husband and I were married 3 years before our first came and even then it was a HUGE adjustment. Don’t rush it.

  5. JD's mommie

    It sounds like you are very mature and that if you did have a baby that you would do a great job taking care of him or her, but you are still so young and you really have not been with your boyfriend very long either. I know you said that you have been living together for 3 months but is that in your own house or with one of ya’lls parents. I would recommend you wait at least a year if not 2 or 3 would even be better you still have your whole life ahead of you, get at least half way through your schooling then think about having a baby.

    Before having a baby you need to be sure you both have stabled jobs, baby stuff is not cheap at all.
    You want your own house and you will need a vehicle.

  6. She is my Sunshine

    Ask him to marry you, get married and then get started.

  7. sentenna

    You’ve been together for 10 months, of course right now he doesn’t feel like being with anyone else.
    But he’s a 19 year old guy who probably hasn’t had many g/f’s or experience. He hasn’t done a lot in his life. He doesn’t know what living truly is all about. He’s just a baby, that hasn’t grown up yet.
    And seriously there aren’t that many 19 year old guys that really want to start a family and settle down. And I don’t blame him one bit.

    Your 18 years old. What kind of living have you done? You just graduated from high school. Your just in college. You don’t even know who you are. You haven’t experienced anything yet. You don’t even know what life is about.

    There is lots of time for babies. But once that baby comes, there will be no more freedom. There will be no more doing what you want, when you want to. You can no longer just come and go as you please. Your life will be turned inside out, upside down. You will be getting up at all hours of the night. You will be taking care of another human being. One that can do nothing for itself. And as an 18 year old, you are no where near ready for that. For you at 18, have no idea what it means to actually have a baby. To take care of a baby.
    Its hard work. Its a lot of work. My youngest is 4 months old and I am constantly trying to meet her needs and wants. On top of which I have a 26 month old son who is very demanding.
    But I am also 30 years old and have an incredible husband that helps me every step of the way.

    You may think your ready but really, if you think about it, your not.

    You need to accomplish far more in your life. You need to do far more then just start popping out kids.

    And no, it never took us 6 – 12 months to conceive these kids. I was pregnant within 6 weeks of going off the pill.

  8. Katie's Mommy

    Wow…when will people get married first and then have a baby? Honey, you’re 17. You have many, many fertile years ahead of you. Please, for the love of God, wait until you are able to support yourself should something happen to the child’s father. Get your degree. Begin a steady career. Then do the baby thing.

    I’m 41. I have a college degree. I’ve been with the same school district for 22 years. I still get nervous about making ends meet. I can’t even imagine being your age with no degree and/or no career in mind and wanting to start a family.

    I remember some advice my mother gave me when I was a teenager: Never rely on a man. You would think this came from a divorced woman or someone in a bad marriage but that isn’t the case. She married my father at 17. Had my sister at 18. Finished her family at 25 (with me). She was a stay-at-home mom. She and my father had a wonderful marriage. They were married 36 years when she passed away in 1996 from Leukemia. She gave me this advice because she would have had a very hard time making ends meet had something happened to my father due to death or divorce.

    I took her advice. Had I not done so my family would be in trouble right now. My husband was laid off in October. Had I not gotten my degree and a steady career I shudder to think what would have happened. My niece is 22. She started her family at 18. She now has 3 children (two pregnancies…the first one resulted in twins). It’s hard. She has some support from the father of her 3rd child, her mother, and me. While I understand you have the support of your boyfriend you really don’t know what life will be like in the next few years. If you break up getting child support is very hard (as my niece is learning the hard way).

    Stick to your studies, get a degree and/or career and then consider a family.

  9. 2010 is our year ? TTC #1

    I think that all these people dont want u to because u still have a life ahead of u but it’ll just be different – yea you’ll be a mommy and daddy but u can get a babysitter every once and awhile; thats not bad to do . But if you think your ready : Than u are, ONLY YOU KNOW ! these people dont know you probally living better than them, who made them CEO of the universe to say u cant do something . so talk to him, ask him how he would feel if yall got pregnant accidently would he be mad; and start talking to him about it from there. My little sister – who is 16 accidently got pregnant and its the best thing that happened to her-shes such a better person and grew up alot and people say she wont make it, but shes honnor role and graduate next year so never let anybody say u cant do something . GOODLUCK! & babydust xoxoxo

Comments are closed.